I thought I was an archaeologist...but I was just a nerd.

There was a dark and twisted path that led between the edge of the Rec Park and a couple of haunted houses to short cut our way over to Pearl Street. Truly, it wasn't much of anything, but at eleven-years-old, one has a tendency to turn anything into everything.

We cut through the path after hanging out down at the park doing something amounting to not much of anything, but no matter. We noticed shiny bits and pieces poking up from the ground. Wide eyed, my friend Stephanie and I looked at each other and made hyper-excited, manic guttural sounds like a couple of spazzed-out losers on parade.

She grabbed a stick and I grabbed a rock, and we began our excavation. Befitting only because this was during my I want to be an archaeologist phase (like every kid in 1981). Of course, I also wanted to be an oceanographer or actress or writer or nun, depending on the day. Yeah, don't ask. This was right before I found out that archaeology was less about looking chic in khakis and quirky hats, and more about knowing, like, science and having to climb and dig a lot. And getting sweaty and dirty. And dealing with bugs. I'm just not the outdoorsy type, as sexy as this all sounds.

But treasure beckoned. Trinkets shined. And I knew. I just knew this was an ancient Indian burial ground replete with undiscovered relics from the days of yore. I thought to myself, what would Nancy Drew do in this situation? Yeah, that's right, Bucko. [Shout out to my main man Richie Cunningham, yo!] Nancy would dig. Nancy would investigate and she wouldn't stop until she got answers. I burrowed my knees into the gnarly path and christened the ground with my rock, stabbing at the soil relentlessly as Steph tackled a nearby spot with her stick.

"Hey, look!" she shouted, proudly holding up the remnants of what looked to be an old fashioned Coke bottle (likely from the year before).

We ran around kind of bumping into each other stupidly for a second, until we returned to pulling out pieces of broken bowls and rotten silverware from the hole Steph was focusing on. Oh my God. This place is a gold mine. We are going to be RICH!

I slowly returned to my excavation site and plunged my rock into the earth one last time, finally noticing something, something that didn't quite belong. Something that made my breath stop.

A pirate's smile crept across my face as I held the long jaw bone up for Steph to see.

I had made a pre-historic discovery.

I believe I suffered a slight stroke because I was drooling out of the left side of my mouth uncontrollably as we gathered and dug up all the dinosaur bones we could find and carefully cradled them into a makeshift gurney made of my friend's Gumby beachtowel. 

Dude, we are going to be famous! 

Of course, we didn't use the word dude back in 1981 quite like we would use "dude" today -- I'm sure it was the late 70s/early 80s equivalent of what one would refer to their female friend in a sassy broad, super casual sort of way. Perhaps something like, Disco Doll, we are going to be famous! I couldn't wait to get home to show my mother the treasure. Indeed, I was a true, real life archaeologist. I mean, this could totally make Ripley's Believe it or Not!

My mother was excited all right. But in a different way than I had hoped. Instead of praising me for my find, she actually acted grossed out that I would dig something like that up and then bring it home, what was I thinking? Blah blah blah. Bellyaching that I dug up some random animal bones out of someone's backyard. I mean, like, as if.

It's called a dinosaur, babe.

Uh, right?  Errr...oh. Shudder. Oh, to be a child. I didn't know. I sincerely thought I had made a great scientific find. I didn't realize my great scientific find was really just me being kind of...blonde.

Well, that kind of ended my taste of wanting to become the she-Indiana Jones, which is probably a good thing. I needed that dose of reality...the lifestyle isn't at all suited for me. I'm far too prissy. And blonde. Ish.

God, no wonder I was such a nerd.